Posted by: Jim | May 25, 2004

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So where was I?

Damn, work has me hopping lately. So where was I?

Oh yeah … Al Quaeda’s ranks are swelling, and gosh darn it, our U.S. intelligence is just sure they’re going to attack this Summer. We don’t know when or where, but the Official U.S. Intelligence Ouija board clearly spelled out the word S-U-M-M-E-R.

Then, Top U.S. Cryptologists entered the word into the official U.S. Intelligence Cootie-Catcher, asking, “Will there be an attack this summer?” S-U-M-M-E-R. They open the flap and it said “Yesssss.”

Then they asked the question “Where will the attack occur?” They shook the official U.S. Intelligence 8-ball and it said “It is uncertain.”

Kidding aside, my question is this: what is accomplished by saying “there will be an attack this summer, but we don’t know when or where?” What? Should we batten down the proverbial hatches? Raise the security alert from yellow to orange? Red maybe? Who might stand to gain by causing ambiguous, unfocusable fear of terrorism?

“OMG! Jim! Are you saying that Bush would manipulate intelligence spin for his own agenda?”

In the words of the Dude: “Fuckin-a!”

-Jim

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